AND THEN AGAIN……..by Tamara Pettit

How am I doing?    It’s been a month today since the death of my husband and I get asked that question quite frequently.   I don’t mind because I know the people that ask sincerely care.    Problem is I don’t really know the answer.  What’s the norm?    Bill and I were both retired so we spent a lot of time together.  He loved food and grocery stores and we spent a lot of time shopping at out-of-the-way locations.  Is it normal that grocery shopping is now difficult for me. I saw a favorite item of his and reached for only to remember he wasn’t there anymore to enjoy itm

I’m best with a plan as to actions I need to take and goals I need to achieve.  Grief, however, honors no plan and just when you think you may find normal again a song, a smell a quote sends you down the rabbit hole of sad.

Humor has gotten not only me but our entire family through some pretty tough times and I’m not giving up on it yet.   Shannon is going to put her house on Aztec Lane near Oak Glen up for sale and move in with me.  Makes sense.  And, our two dogs, Max and Rooney will no longer be “only dogs” but will bond and have companionship.

I made the plan which involved getting her bed moved in.  Bill Stewart is our go to guy for these things..  His truck brought the mattress and box springs for her queen bed.  This house was built in 1953 when people were smaller (or friendlier) cause the largest mattress they had then was a full mattress.   No queen  and no king so no wide stairs.    We only had six steps to get that box springs up the stairs and we were thiiiiiiiis close.    For two hours Bill tried everything.   Shannon was back at her old house packing up bed clothes when she got the text  “We need help!”   She arrived to see Bill pulling the problem up on u-tube to find a resolution.  And me? I was doing my part with a can of PAM It made sense to me that if we would make it slippery it would slide on by.   That didn’t work and now I have to figure out how to get PAM out of my carpet.

Stubborn problems call for drastic measure (and the Steelers were on at 1 p.m.) so I thought if we could just hack the offending corner off we could clear the steps.  I went in search of a hack saw and emerged with a hedge clipper.   I went in search of of a hammer and returned with the only thing I could find.   It was a ceremonial hammer with a plate on it that read “demolition of TS&T factory” which made way for the Chester business park. Well neither of those worked.

We were laughing so hard we knew we were beat.   The box springs went to the garage and we called and ordered some magical box springs McKinneys is delivering Monday.  Life is changing and I’m  determined to change with it.     I’m sure they’re will be much to cry about in coming weeks and months but putting two generations back together in the same house means there will certainly be much to laugh about.